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Saturday, November 24, 2001 if i thought yesterday was bad, today has been worse. my little brother got himself into some trouble again last night. stupid shit, but enough to get him in trouble. it hurts, i trusted him, stuck up for him. we even talked about all this, i tried my hardest to make sure he knew what was right and what was wrong. it feels like he betrayed my trust and i dont know what to do. im so worried about him. pictures of him being in trouble two summers ago just fly in my head, and i can say that was one of the hardest things i ever had to go through. his life is going to take a drastic change soon, my father is pissed. so is my mother. you know, i dont care that he was drinking (even though he knew he shouldnt)...he's a smart kid and none of us can say we didnt drink before 21. he had a beer..he knew his limit, he didnt get smashed like his other friends. what scares me is that he was stupid enough to get into the car with someone who had a lot more than him. they ran a stop sign...thank god no one was there. but..i cant help think what if the cops didnt call last night, what if it was a hospital...or worse...the morgue. i cant even begin to explain the fear of that...what if i had lost him?? is all that really worth a beer? *sighs* im terrified... lilwolf 4:17 PM 
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